Great for Snuggling

I miss him, and that scares me.

I was single for a long long time. In fact I've never really had relationships, just passing ships. Flings thats didn't even last long enough to for me to care when they end.

I thought for sure in my mind, that I didn't need men, didn't need someone like everyone else seems to. Then he came along and fucked it all up.

I was spending time with someone, someone who I could discover and let him discover me. It was exciting and nerve racking. It was happiness and yet so much stress.

I don't know if I miss him specifically, or just being with someone. Maybe a bit of both. And I realize it's the small things in a relationship that I love. That hold it all together. That make people want to be together.

I miss how he started nicknames for me.
I miss how he'd cackle when I'd tease him.
I miss how he'd make me laugh when we were fighting
I miss how he'd talk passionately about things I didn't know about or didn't care about before
I miss how he'd reassure me on the phone over stupid insecurities
I miss how he'd kiss my nose, my neck, my bare back.
I miss how he'd reach for me in the night and pull me to him.
I miss how he'd squeeze me when I sat on his lap on the skytrain so I'd know he was paying attention

I hate alot of things he did too, especially since they outweighed the good. But the thing is he gave me a taste of companionship and now I understand the bitterness of being lonely. Of wanting that arm around you at night and finding nothing. I want to say this because I hope someone will read it. Women should be adored. Women should be loved. Women are the feminine divine which bring light and passion and kindness and love to this cold planet. Every single woman out there deserves someone, especially someone who knows the worth of what they hold. I don't care whether men suck or they will always suck, they're still needed, and they're still great for snuggling :P